Back in January, I started following Japanese lessons. I think, if I am destined to lazy about for a couple of years in Japan, at least I should have something to show for it. In addition, it would be so nice to actually be able to understand the labels of products in the supermarket, or at least manage to order a tall latte at Starbucks without the barista looking at you with pitying eyes while he/she shows you the menu with pictures.
So I started at a language centre not far from our place, just a few minutes' walk in fact. I signed for five hours a week, two hours and a half per lesson, mondays and wednesdays. I even had two classmates: Frenchy Girl and seasoned American Mater Familias, which was quite nice. Our teacher, or 'sensei' was a 50-something Japanese lady, stick thin, well travelled and who spoke French with a lot of conviction. Let's call her Super Sensei.
Some time in February, they informed us that the centre was closing but that they were going to continue on one-to-one lessons at our homes, if we so wished. As I still had a good 90 hours of courses paid by Mr M's company, I signed in and requested to continue with Super Sensei.
I am now doing two hours a week, in theory to have time to study properly in between lesson. The reality is that I end up doing all my week's worth or homework half an hour before Super Sensei arrives, which leaves the practicing bit totally out of the picture. I still hesitate with a few of the hiragana characters (is this a 'ra' or a 'sa'?) which I am supposed to know by heart by now and have still not managed to impress the girls at the Starbucks inside the Tsutaya bookshop. Super Sensei every now and then says 'you need to study this', which in my mind translates as "you lazy ass gaijin wife, learn this hiragana stuff once and for all!"
Truth is, I know I am not putting the hours, the study, in. I have never really studied much in my life. I mean studing for hours on end, preparing for an exam. Wait, that's not true. I did study a lot for History of Art in university, but only because I really loved the subject and the professor was a bit scary but fair. I had lots of admiration for this woman and couldn't contemplate not knowing anything she asked. Other than that, I guess I have a sort of Attention Deficit Disorder in the sense that I cannot concentrate on the same thing for a long time. My mind starts to wander, I need to take a walk or watch some TV....etc. I did quite well at school and at university, so this is just how I am: l-a-z-y....
Anyway, I am resolved to devote at least an hour every week actually studying Japanese at home (and not the hour before Super Sensei arrives home for the lesson). In the meantime, in order to keep Super Sensei happy, I have institutionalised coffee breaks with Belgian cookies mid-lesson. Last week I bought LU 'Petit Ecoliers" with dark chocolate top. She said it was a nice flavour combination. I say it has earned me some points but I need to impress her with my Hiragana skills next Monday or there will be no butter gallette that will save my ass.
Wednesday, 21 April 2010
Wednesday, 14 April 2010
And, at last, Spring is here! (well, sort of)
Taking advantage of yet another rainy morning (really, is there any other kind?) here I am squeezing in a little post amidst my Tokyo Tour Guide duties (Mr M's cousin and her husband are visiting us this week).
So, anyway, what is it with all this rain? Isn't the rainy season supposed to be in June? Hello, this is April! For the last couple fo weeks it's been one day hot and warmy, one day rainy and horrid and very much Brusselesque weather.
And cold, quite cold for a month into Spring.
The cherry blossoms are almost all gone by now, courtesy of the chilling winds, so now the streets are paved with a layer of mouldy pale-pink petals that are definitely not that cute anymore. On the positive side, the cherry trees are all sprouting green, which is a very nice view and screams of "Spring! Spring!".
Tomorrow, Mr M is taking the day off and Bibu is skiping creche, so we will go somewhere as it's our guests' final day in the land of the rising sun. It's been really nice to have them here with us, albeit for a short time, only a week. My parents are next in the Detoured Casa. They'll arrive just after the Golden Week and they'll stay for a month. I am really looking forward to them being here with us, specially with Bibu, who will turn 2 while they are here. I think for my parents it will be such a big adventure, coming from the other side of the world, literally, after a 32plus hour trip. I don't think they ever dreamt of visiting Japan, but hey, did I ever imagine that one day I would be living in Tokyo, not working and living the lala expat life? Nope, either.
Right, I should go now and do some edifying house work. Ta-dah!
So, anyway, what is it with all this rain? Isn't the rainy season supposed to be in June? Hello, this is April! For the last couple fo weeks it's been one day hot and warmy, one day rainy and horrid and very much Brusselesque weather.
And cold, quite cold for a month into Spring.
The cherry blossoms are almost all gone by now, courtesy of the chilling winds, so now the streets are paved with a layer of mouldy pale-pink petals that are definitely not that cute anymore. On the positive side, the cherry trees are all sprouting green, which is a very nice view and screams of "Spring! Spring!".
Tomorrow, Mr M is taking the day off and Bibu is skiping creche, so we will go somewhere as it's our guests' final day in the land of the rising sun. It's been really nice to have them here with us, albeit for a short time, only a week. My parents are next in the Detoured Casa. They'll arrive just after the Golden Week and they'll stay for a month. I am really looking forward to them being here with us, specially with Bibu, who will turn 2 while they are here. I think for my parents it will be such a big adventure, coming from the other side of the world, literally, after a 32plus hour trip. I don't think they ever dreamt of visiting Japan, but hey, did I ever imagine that one day I would be living in Tokyo, not working and living the lala expat life? Nope, either.
Right, I should go now and do some edifying house work. Ta-dah!
Monday, 5 April 2010
Something happened on the way to Spring
I had planned to post about sakura blossom season here in Tokyo and all things "hanami", but a couple of things happened recently that kind of detoured that line of thought.
Last week, as I was idling my way through the dark forest of Facebook (is there any other way?) a former colleague of mine who was online, told me that one guy at the office had died very unexpectedly during a business trip to Moscow. The guy in question (the dead guy) was a 60-something, rather odd character, perpetually in a hurry (this may have had to do with his demise, courtesy of a heart attack) and perpetually stealing from everybody's fruit basket when he thought nobody was watching (we knew it was him). He had grown up kids, about my age or older, and a properly much younger Russian girlfriend (as you do). Anyway, the news about his death really struck me as this guy was the last person from the company I met before returning to Tokyo this January. At that time he was en route to Moscow and we all shared the same plane to Frankfurt. We chatted a bit in the airport about work, I introduced Mr M and Bibu to him, we said our hurried goodbyes when people started to board the plane, and that was it.
Now this guy is dead.
On another unrelated piece of news, one of the teachers at Bibu's daycare said her goodbyes last week, as she was returning to the Netherlands, where she is from, in order to follow some treatment for an unspecified illness, which could most likelly be depression, althought the "d" word was never mentioned. This lady had moved to Tokyo 15 years ago, to help raise her sister's daughter and had worked non-stop since then, taking little holidays and generally putting other people's needs before her, I think. So her mum came to Tokyo to take her back and it's not very clear when or whether she will be back.
These two unrelated events have been humming in my mind for a few days already. About this dead guy, I keep thinking, did he know, back in January, that he had only three months to live? How did he live those last three months? Did he live them in the midst of petty, everyday stuff, driving his car and checking emails and going to the supermarket and cleaning under his nails and clipping the hairs in this nostrils? And the teacher, does she want to be back in Europe? How is it to leave behind a life of 15 years and go back to a country that has not been your "home" for an eternity?
I am thinking about this as spring in Tokyo finally makes its way forward, sashaying its delicate frame through the falling petals of the cherry trees.
Last week, as I was idling my way through the dark forest of Facebook (is there any other way?) a former colleague of mine who was online, told me that one guy at the office had died very unexpectedly during a business trip to Moscow. The guy in question (the dead guy) was a 60-something, rather odd character, perpetually in a hurry (this may have had to do with his demise, courtesy of a heart attack) and perpetually stealing from everybody's fruit basket when he thought nobody was watching (we knew it was him). He had grown up kids, about my age or older, and a properly much younger Russian girlfriend (as you do). Anyway, the news about his death really struck me as this guy was the last person from the company I met before returning to Tokyo this January. At that time he was en route to Moscow and we all shared the same plane to Frankfurt. We chatted a bit in the airport about work, I introduced Mr M and Bibu to him, we said our hurried goodbyes when people started to board the plane, and that was it.
Now this guy is dead.
On another unrelated piece of news, one of the teachers at Bibu's daycare said her goodbyes last week, as she was returning to the Netherlands, where she is from, in order to follow some treatment for an unspecified illness, which could most likelly be depression, althought the "d" word was never mentioned. This lady had moved to Tokyo 15 years ago, to help raise her sister's daughter and had worked non-stop since then, taking little holidays and generally putting other people's needs before her, I think. So her mum came to Tokyo to take her back and it's not very clear when or whether she will be back.
These two unrelated events have been humming in my mind for a few days already. About this dead guy, I keep thinking, did he know, back in January, that he had only three months to live? How did he live those last three months? Did he live them in the midst of petty, everyday stuff, driving his car and checking emails and going to the supermarket and cleaning under his nails and clipping the hairs in this nostrils? And the teacher, does she want to be back in Europe? How is it to leave behind a life of 15 years and go back to a country that has not been your "home" for an eternity?
I am thinking about this as spring in Tokyo finally makes its way forward, sashaying its delicate frame through the falling petals of the cherry trees.
Tuesday, 2 March 2010
Marching days
I know, I know, February is like the poor relative at the Month's Ball, but still, what happened to February, anyone?
On my side of things, February has been a sort of "blah" month. Nothing too exciting going on, other than planning what to do on other, more interesting months of the year. Being now officially in March, I can safely report that the difference with February is not yet that evident. We have hope, though.
As Bibu does not go to daycare on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I kind of hoped that today he would oblige and sleep a bit later, say until 7:30 or something. But no such luck, of course. At around 6:30 I could hear his bablings which I pretended to ignore until around 7. I say "pretended" as it's literally impossible for me to go back to sleep with a background of low-decibel whinning. Mr M has no such problem, I am sure he could sleep next to a functioning pneumatic driller.
Anyway, early start and Bibu was ready to hit the "páque" as soon as breakfast was done. I diverted his attention for a while with some drawing and a Skype session with the abuelos and we finally left the appartment around 10.
The weather today was just plain awful, cold and grey (very much like at home in Brussels, I should note) so we just did a walk until Azabu Juban for some groceries' shopping and then a quick stop at the Starbucks in the big Tsutaya bookshop in Roppongi Hills. As usual, the Tsutaya was populated mostly with "wives who don't work and whose kids are at school for a few good hours" variety. Give or take a couple of baby-ed expats, and a couple of men perusing the "Runners Weekly" or whatever, it is was pretty much a ladies joint.
Bibu behaved quite well -I suppose the fleeting presence of a cranberry scone had something to do with it- an then we were off to the playground nearby. We didn't stay long as it was indeed getting very chilly, but it was nice.
The afternoon nap went as usual, then it was milk and cookies for Bibu (he explicitly asked for the milk) and off for then another walk. Indeed I go out a lot with Bibu, but with no TV in the house and a very hiperactive kiddo, well, he needs his free air and so do I. I am happy that he really likes to walk, so hopefully his stroller days will be over in the next few months or so. Granted, it's tedious at times running after him in the street, checking that he doesn't walk in the pavement and by all means I still need to go out with the stroller at hand, as last week I decided to leave it in the appartment and ended up carrying 13 kg of descendant in my arms back home, much to the dislike of my back, ouch!
Mr M is again entertaining his visiting colleagues tonight and leaves for Shangai tomorrow, for 3 days. In addition, I have arranged my Japanese catch-up lessson for Friday morning, meaning this week I will have classes every day that Bibu is at the creche so no free morning. Not ideal, but I didn't have much of a choice, seeing as the course finishes in three weeks and that I am going to miss two classes.
So, anyway, this is what my typical days look like lately. definitely looking forward to warmer weathers.
As Bibu does not go to daycare on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I kind of hoped that today he would oblige and sleep a bit later, say until 7:30 or something. But no such luck, of course. At around 6:30 I could hear his bablings which I pretended to ignore until around 7. I say "pretended" as it's literally impossible for me to go back to sleep with a background of low-decibel whinning. Mr M has no such problem, I am sure he could sleep next to a functioning pneumatic driller.
Anyway, early start and Bibu was ready to hit the "páque" as soon as breakfast was done. I diverted his attention for a while with some drawing and a Skype session with the abuelos and we finally left the appartment around 10.
The weather today was just plain awful, cold and grey (very much like at home in Brussels, I should note) so we just did a walk until Azabu Juban for some groceries' shopping and then a quick stop at the Starbucks in the big Tsutaya bookshop in Roppongi Hills. As usual, the Tsutaya was populated mostly with "wives who don't work and whose kids are at school for a few good hours" variety. Give or take a couple of baby-ed expats, and a couple of men perusing the "Runners Weekly" or whatever, it is was pretty much a ladies joint.
Bibu behaved quite well -I suppose the fleeting presence of a cranberry scone had something to do with it- an then we were off to the playground nearby. We didn't stay long as it was indeed getting very chilly, but it was nice.
The afternoon nap went as usual, then it was milk and cookies for Bibu (he explicitly asked for the milk) and off for then another walk. Indeed I go out a lot with Bibu, but with no TV in the house and a very hiperactive kiddo, well, he needs his free air and so do I. I am happy that he really likes to walk, so hopefully his stroller days will be over in the next few months or so. Granted, it's tedious at times running after him in the street, checking that he doesn't walk in the pavement and by all means I still need to go out with the stroller at hand, as last week I decided to leave it in the appartment and ended up carrying 13 kg of descendant in my arms back home, much to the dislike of my back, ouch!
Mr M is again entertaining his visiting colleagues tonight and leaves for Shangai tomorrow, for 3 days. In addition, I have arranged my Japanese catch-up lessson for Friday morning, meaning this week I will have classes every day that Bibu is at the creche so no free morning. Not ideal, but I didn't have much of a choice, seeing as the course finishes in three weeks and that I am going to miss two classes.
So, anyway, this is what my typical days look like lately. definitely looking forward to warmer weathers.
Monday, 1 February 2010
Challenging peanuts or the joys and pits of raising small kids
A couple of bloggers I follow have recently written about the struggle it is sometimes to cope with their toddlers. The subject definitely rings home, with Bibu being 20 months and fast approaching the "terrible two's" as they call them.
Actually, today is a very appropiate day to touch this topic as a few minutes ago I put Bibu on the corner for hitting poor mama on purpose after head-butting mama by accident. The accidental head-butting (more a "teeth-butting" as he left the inprint of his front teeth in my cheekbone) I can take. The taking a plastic fan, the ones they give you everywhere in the Tokyo summertime to fan yourself while enduring 31 degrees and more humidity than the Amazonian Forest, and hitting me deliberately with it, that I could not take, and off we was sent to the "time-out corner". It was the culmination of a difficult morning, him being a bit tired, I guess, and complaining about everything, and me feeling my patience run thinner and thinner by the second. Bibu stayed put in the corner and after a couple of minutes I went to explain how it was always baaad to hit someone and that he had to say sorry mum, pat-pat in the back, big hug and kiss and all forgotten.
By all means, up to now I have to say that Bibu is indeed a very sweet little boy whose tantrums are quite short lived and low on the annoyance factor. He knows when he has done something wrong and usually lets go of a fixed (bad) idea after a couple of minutes. I've experience first hand some very horrible tantrums by some fellow little friends of Bibu and it definitely makes me appreciate his good temper even more. Of course, that may all change in a few months, even a few weeks, but for now, all is good most of the time.
We all know that bad behaviour is normal part and parcel of growing up and that toddlers are learning their boundaries constantly and that they need us to teach them what's wrong and what's right and why. It's part of parenthood and a fact of life. But indeed at times it can get frustrating when you say something calmly for the 646478946513th time and no result, or when you are trying to manage a tantrum in the middle of the supermarket when you have not slept good, you are dressed in baby stained clothes, your grey hair roots are showing and you have not make up on and look like Morticia Adams. You know it's a small thing in THE BIG SCOPE OF THINGS and that THIS TOO SHALL PASS, but it's not nice and can seem at times like an unsurmontable mountain.
Personally, in these few months since we moved to Tokyo and I started my two-year full time mum status thing, I've realised that being the whole day with your kids is much harder work than going to the office every day. I am not saying it's not nice, not at all. I love the fact I get to spend these couple of years so close to Bibu and being there for him to see him grow and help him grow. But it is much, much harder than I thought.
In an office job, you know when your working day begins and when it ends. You know that every now and then during the day you can take a break and have a cup of coffee and a chat with your colleagues and have lunch in peace. With Bibu, I know I usually have a couple of hours in the afternoon when he's having his nap and another couple of hours at night once he's gonne to bed. The rest of the day is arranged around him. Eating is something you do at the speed of lightning, almost choking on your food while trying to avoid pumpking puree to become a permanent fixture of the carpet.
There is also the endless cooking -and planning of cooking and making sure you have the ingredients you need for all the cooking-, and a bit of house cleaning on the side and your days go very, very fast indeed.
On the other hand, I dont' need to rush from the office to the nursery every afternoon on time to pick Bibu up, as was the case in Brussels. I dont' feel guilty of leaving him the whole day at daycare and only enjoying him for a meagre couple of hours every day. Now I am there myself to educate him, without having a nanny do it for me....etc.
I think what it all boils down to is that there is no perfect situation and it's a case of "the grass is greener on the neighbours' garden". If you work, you daydream of not working anymore and be the whole day at home with your kid, if you do, there are days when office life seems like heaven.
I think there are no 'perfect' mums and 'perfect' kids, as there are no "perfect" jobs, and that there are periods when things are a bit more challenging than others.
I can be quite a control freak and feel bad when I feel things are out of control, the house is a mess, Bibu is behaving badly and I am super tired. On those moments I try to stay "zen", get on with it and try to remember that, in the big picture, these challenging moments are just peanuts.
Actually, today is a very appropiate day to touch this topic as a few minutes ago I put Bibu on the corner for hitting poor mama on purpose after head-butting mama by accident. The accidental head-butting (more a "teeth-butting" as he left the inprint of his front teeth in my cheekbone) I can take. The taking a plastic fan, the ones they give you everywhere in the Tokyo summertime to fan yourself while enduring 31 degrees and more humidity than the Amazonian Forest, and hitting me deliberately with it, that I could not take, and off we was sent to the "time-out corner". It was the culmination of a difficult morning, him being a bit tired, I guess, and complaining about everything, and me feeling my patience run thinner and thinner by the second. Bibu stayed put in the corner and after a couple of minutes I went to explain how it was always baaad to hit someone and that he had to say sorry mum, pat-pat in the back, big hug and kiss and all forgotten.
By all means, up to now I have to say that Bibu is indeed a very sweet little boy whose tantrums are quite short lived and low on the annoyance factor. He knows when he has done something wrong and usually lets go of a fixed (bad) idea after a couple of minutes. I've experience first hand some very horrible tantrums by some fellow little friends of Bibu and it definitely makes me appreciate his good temper even more. Of course, that may all change in a few months, even a few weeks, but for now, all is good most of the time.
We all know that bad behaviour is normal part and parcel of growing up and that toddlers are learning their boundaries constantly and that they need us to teach them what's wrong and what's right and why. It's part of parenthood and a fact of life. But indeed at times it can get frustrating when you say something calmly for the 646478946513th time and no result, or when you are trying to manage a tantrum in the middle of the supermarket when you have not slept good, you are dressed in baby stained clothes, your grey hair roots are showing and you have not make up on and look like Morticia Adams. You know it's a small thing in THE BIG SCOPE OF THINGS and that THIS TOO SHALL PASS, but it's not nice and can seem at times like an unsurmontable mountain.
Personally, in these few months since we moved to Tokyo and I started my two-year full time mum status thing, I've realised that being the whole day with your kids is much harder work than going to the office every day. I am not saying it's not nice, not at all. I love the fact I get to spend these couple of years so close to Bibu and being there for him to see him grow and help him grow. But it is much, much harder than I thought.
In an office job, you know when your working day begins and when it ends. You know that every now and then during the day you can take a break and have a cup of coffee and a chat with your colleagues and have lunch in peace. With Bibu, I know I usually have a couple of hours in the afternoon when he's having his nap and another couple of hours at night once he's gonne to bed. The rest of the day is arranged around him. Eating is something you do at the speed of lightning, almost choking on your food while trying to avoid pumpking puree to become a permanent fixture of the carpet.
There is also the endless cooking -and planning of cooking and making sure you have the ingredients you need for all the cooking-, and a bit of house cleaning on the side and your days go very, very fast indeed.
On the other hand, I dont' need to rush from the office to the nursery every afternoon on time to pick Bibu up, as was the case in Brussels. I dont' feel guilty of leaving him the whole day at daycare and only enjoying him for a meagre couple of hours every day. Now I am there myself to educate him, without having a nanny do it for me....etc.
I think what it all boils down to is that there is no perfect situation and it's a case of "the grass is greener on the neighbours' garden". If you work, you daydream of not working anymore and be the whole day at home with your kid, if you do, there are days when office life seems like heaven.
I think there are no 'perfect' mums and 'perfect' kids, as there are no "perfect" jobs, and that there are periods when things are a bit more challenging than others.
I can be quite a control freak and feel bad when I feel things are out of control, the house is a mess, Bibu is behaving badly and I am super tired. On those moments I try to stay "zen", get on with it and try to remember that, in the big picture, these challenging moments are just peanuts.
It's a cold, cold winterrrr
We are in FEBRUARY already, darling! February!!! And it's COLD! Cold, cold, cold.
Mr M left yesterday for Shangai and he'll return on Friday.
The heating is on (a toasty 23 degrees) but my hands are semi frozen still.
I think tonight I'll sleep with my granny wooly socks on.
PS: brrr......!
Mr M left yesterday for Shangai and he'll return on Friday.
The heating is on (a toasty 23 degrees) but my hands are semi frozen still.
I think tonight I'll sleep with my granny wooly socks on.
PS: brrr......!
Wednesday, 27 January 2010
Tokyo with toddlers: Tokyo's Metropolitan Children Hall
It's been a while since my last children-related post, so here you go:
Yesterday there was no school at Bibu's daycare, so along with two other mums from his group, we headed to the Children's Castle in near Omotesando. We arrived and to our surprise the place only opens at 12:30 on weekdays, which is kind of odd for a kids place. In toddlerdom, middday equals lunch followed by long afternoon nap (also known as LAN), so waiting until the place opened was not really a very inviting option.
We asked the nice ladies at the counter where else we could go that would be open at 10:30 and they gave us a flyer of the "Tokyo Metropolitan Children's Hall" which was about 10 minutes' walk in nearby Shibuya (same street as the Tower Records shop)
So there we headed and I have to say it was a nice surprise. It's basically a 5 floor building completely devoted to Tokyoite kids (and their stressed parents) and it's completely free of charge. We headed to the toddlers free-play area, where there is a large wooden structure with slides and a low hanging bridge and plenty of toys for small girls and boys. The area was heavily staffed with minders who kept things tidy and did even speak a little English. Seeing as our brood were enjoying themselves so much at the toddler room, we didn't visit the other floors, but there is also a large library, a rooftop playground which opens during the summer months, and several arts and science areas.
Being a weekday, there was some people but not at all crowded, which was nice. I imagine on weekends it must be a bit more 'cosy', so to speak. The only minor drawback was that there was no cafeteria, only a pic-nic area where you can eat your bento and some vending machines.
All in all, a great morning out. Bibu and his pals were completely exhausted after all the playing and running around and the LAN went like a dream. :-)
Yesterday there was no school at Bibu's daycare, so along with two other mums from his group, we headed to the Children's Castle in near Omotesando. We arrived and to our surprise the place only opens at 12:30 on weekdays, which is kind of odd for a kids place. In toddlerdom, middday equals lunch followed by long afternoon nap (also known as LAN), so waiting until the place opened was not really a very inviting option.
We asked the nice ladies at the counter where else we could go that would be open at 10:30 and they gave us a flyer of the "Tokyo Metropolitan Children's Hall" which was about 10 minutes' walk in nearby Shibuya (same street as the Tower Records shop)
So there we headed and I have to say it was a nice surprise. It's basically a 5 floor building completely devoted to Tokyoite kids (and their stressed parents) and it's completely free of charge. We headed to the toddlers free-play area, where there is a large wooden structure with slides and a low hanging bridge and plenty of toys for small girls and boys. The area was heavily staffed with minders who kept things tidy and did even speak a little English. Seeing as our brood were enjoying themselves so much at the toddler room, we didn't visit the other floors, but there is also a large library, a rooftop playground which opens during the summer months, and several arts and science areas.
Being a weekday, there was some people but not at all crowded, which was nice. I imagine on weekends it must be a bit more 'cosy', so to speak. The only minor drawback was that there was no cafeteria, only a pic-nic area where you can eat your bento and some vending machines.
All in all, a great morning out. Bibu and his pals were completely exhausted after all the playing and running around and the LAN went like a dream. :-)
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